A milestone for Brian

This morning, Brian was determined to be ineligible for special education services. My heart is singing today.

My sweet middle child will be six years old in three weeks. Our special needs journey with him began on March 4, 2006, at the Federation for Children with Special Needs conference. I had attended because Abby was recently diagnosed with PDD-NOS, and wanted to learn all I could about supporting her.

In one breakout session, the two presenters were talking about their autistic children. I had some concerns about Brian; at 18 months old, approximately three months prior to the conference, it had seemed that he had stopped adding new words to his vocabulary. I wasn't sure, though; Abby had been so precocious in her language development that I didn't know if what I was seeing in Brian was more typical. But then, in that breakout session, one of the presenters mimed her young son looking at the wheels of a toy train as he played with it on the floor. I immediately started shaking, recognizing Brian's behavior with his toy cars.

I felt like I was in a horror movie, having the autism monster claim yet another one of my children. The anguish in my heart over what I perceived to be another tragedy for my family was too much to bear. I slid into a deep depression for several months, even contemplating suicide at one point. It was the absolute low point of my life.

Although I was in many ways functioning very poorly during this time, I did spring into action immediately on Brian's behalf. He was evaluated for Early Intervention services, and began a robust program of individual play therapy, speech therapy and music therapy. That summer, he began attending play groups at the Early Intervention site, and when he was formally diagnosed later that fall, he began receiving several hours of ABA services each week.

I have often said that Early Intervention saved Brian from a full autism diagnosis, and I still believe that, today. In particular, his primary EI therapist, the incomparable Tricia Carroll, brought his level of social, emotional and language functioning an incredible distance prior to his diagnosis, and continued to help him make rapid progress until he aged out of EI on his 3rd birthday. The other therapies were invaluable, but Tricia's understanding of ASDs and her ability to connect with Brian and bring him out of himself -- teaching him to make eye contact, helping him learn to play with his brother, challenging him in different play and learning situations -- was a the most influential factor in his development for the 15 months or so he was in EI.

At age 3, Brian then enrolled in the Milton Integrated Preschool, where he was fortunate to have Mary Beth Callahan as his teacher every morning and for double-sessions two days a week. He received speech and ABA services, and continued to grow and develop under her care. When he was four, Sarah Richardson was his teacher at the Integrated Preschool, and we also enrolled him in afternoon sessions at the Adams Street Early Learning Center, with Kathleen Corliss as his teacher. He continued to make progress, and we had high hopes for kindergarten, as well as a very robust IEP to help him make the transition.

Those hopes have been more than fulfilled this year. In Soondarie Barker's incredible kindergarten classroom, Brian has become indistinguishable from his peers, which has been our goal for the past four years. Looking at him, one would never guess that he carries an ASD diagnosis. He is social, he is engaging and he is age-appropriate in all observable ways, including his tendency to get in trouble now and then. Academically, he continues to work and test well above age level, and will require differentiated instruction to keep him challenged as he goes on to first grade.

I feel like Brian has graduated, and I am so proud. I am also eternally grateful to those individuals who have helped Brian, and us, over the past four years. You have built my little star-shooter's launch pad, suited him up and tested all flight systems. Now, the sky's the limit.

Xiang Yu feature

My article on Xiang Yu, the winner of the 2010 Menuhin Competition, ran in yesterday's Patriot Ledger.

I really enjoyed talking with Yu. He has an unusual maturity and Zen-like attitude about the Competition, which I didn't expect at all. Perhaps that was due to remembering how competitive and driven I was in music school, myself. He's a genuinely nice kid, and I hope he achieves his dreams.

You can see video of his performances at the Competition here.

This weekend's column

I had an unlucky streak a couple of weeks ago. Fortunately, today started with pancakes I didn't have to make, myself. Happy Mother's Day to all the moms out there, and may good luck find you today and always.

A good week

Accomplishments this week:

• Stuck to my nutrition and fitness programs every single day. Well, except for the m&m incident on Thursday.
• Did not beat myself up for the m&m incident on Thursday.
• Walked the kids to school one day. They've been wanting to try it, and although I wasn't sure they could walk the mile, they did. Next time we'll just have to leave earlier so we're not rushing the whole way.
• Received a very nice email from the editor of one of the publications to which I regularly contribute, congratulating me on my Erma Bombeck award and saying various other nice things about my writing. It made my day.
• Also had another very nice email exchange with another editor at the same publication, which turned into a mutual admiration society. It's nice to have that now and again.
• Practiced with Abby and Brian most days, taught lessons, made good dinners and tried new recipes.
• Taught Timmy how to play Pachisi, after my mom sent us a game in the mail (thanks, Mom!) We've each won one game.
• Met a few little deadlines.
• Made time to read, which is something I love to do but rarely take the time to do it.

All in all, a good week.

Abby's bike camp

The Boston Globe ran a few photos of the Lose the Training Wheels program in yesterday's "Globe South" section. There was a much more in-depth pictorial online. A smiling, helmeted Abby is in the third photo. Enjoy!

Concert preview

Here's my preview of the Plymouth Philharmonic Celtic Pops concert, coming up this weekend. I didn't play up the Guinness as much as I would have liked to.

Better

It's been two days since I wrote my last post, and I'm feeling much better. It's been a good weekend, with some extra sleep and downtime for me, both of which I desperately needed.

I did my Sunday-morning yoga, and although it was hard (because I haven't done it in more than a week, almost two) I felt better for having done it. I got some household things done. The boys had two birthday parties yesterday and Abby had friends over today, so that kept them occupied and cut down on the regular cries of "Mom!"

I also lost almost two pounds in my second week of using SparkPeople, an online weight-loss/healthy lifestyle resource. When I started it two weeks ago, I was pretty overwhelmed by all the information on the website, plus just trying to find my way around. I told myself I'd give it two weeks and if I hated it, I'd stop using it.

I've lost just over 4 pounds in the two weeks, and am actually really loving the website. I'm writing a small article about it, so I'm not going to wax too poetic here, but there are a lot of features and functions that are just great for an introverted planner-type who loves data, like myself.

***
This is another unusual week, schedule-wise. Some lessons are rearranged; I need to teach some additional makeup lessons; I have a dentist appointment (boo!) and a hair appointment (yay!) I also have Timmy's preschool teacher conference, which is fine, but it means Timmy doesn't have school that day. I think I see a full morning of the gym and grocery shopping for us after the conference.

Last but not least, Abby has been in a much better frame of mind, which makes everything easier. She had a terrific day at school on Friday, and has continued to be chipper and mostly cooperative for much of the last two days. She isn't even too upset by the boil water order we're under here in the Boston area, because of a gigantic water main problem.

All in all, it's been a good weekend. I'd like it to carry over into the next 5 days.