A good day

The kids had the day off from school today, for a teacher in-service. We needed to take the van to the repair shop first thing, so I was facing a (forecasted) rainy day with three kids and no car. What to do?

For starters, we kept to our normal morning routine. Both Abby and Brian practiced, and Abby, in particular, was really focused and playing very, very well. She was also pointing out to Earl the musical similarities between her current piece and a piece she worked on a few months ago, explaining her dynamics and martelé bowing to me, and playing with excellent tone and mostly excellent intonation. She's blossoming into quite a musician.

Brian got a new piano practice plan; he's thrilled to be working on the B major scale, with its unusual left hand fingering and five whole sharps. He just eats this stuff up. He's playing "Honeybee" hands together with dynamics. "Cuckoo" won't be far off, at this rate.

After our morning routines, the kids miraculously decided to entertain themselves with drawing, coloring and reading independently and to each other. I took care of a few household things, and after lunch, we took a walk down to the auto repair shop, since the van was ready. It's just down the street, and it was good for the four of us to get out of the house for a bit.

Then, back home, the kids watched Martha Speaks, and we worked on our big project for the day: making "monster cookies" -- really just glorified chocolate chip cookies, but colorfully named from Abby's own kids' cookbook. Timmy measured the brown sugar, Abby dealt with the butter, Brian helped with eggs and they all took turns measuring flour. They were all great little helpers and it was a lot of fun. The cookies were pretty good, too.

After the boys' dance class and Abby's choir rehearsal, Abby and I made dinner together. She had chosen a chicken fingers recipe from the same kids' cookbook, and she prepared the crumb topping and breaded the chicken strips. She also helped season the oven fries, and put together a veggie plate, including peeling cucumbers, virtually on her own. It was such a treat to have her so interested, and focused, and connected. Everything turned out pretty well, too.

We had family game night -- a 40-minute cutthroat game of Uno, then snacks and bedtime. Abby was perseverating on tsunamis a bit; Brian brought up the topic (which he called "salamis" but then explained what he meant) and Abby ran with it. I hope she's able to put it out of her mind to get to sleep. She seemed pretty worried when I tucked her in, despite our reassurances.

I'm so grateful to have had such a nice day with the kids. Abby has been in a very good place lately, overall, and that makes life so much easier for everyone. Plus, I feel like I actually have a daughter to relate to, instead of a project to work on. I write that, fully understanding that it sounds cold and distant, but for me, that's how parenting Abby has been for most of the past eight years. This new connectedness is such a revelation, an emotional opening-up, that all I can do is be thankful and enjoy it.

***
Abby said a very funny thing tonight. We play Uno with a set of cards that have characters from the last Batman movie on it. On one card, there's a clean-cut man dressed in a suit. Abby played that card, looked at it, and said, "He looks like he's going to work!"

I agreed, and she continued, "He's like, 'See ya later Batman, I'm going to work!'"

I agreed again. And then, the clincher: "He's like Dad but with a different head!"

We all cracked up, and Abby joined in the laughter. I don't know if she meant to be funny, but she was, and she enjoyed it, too.

***
I wish I could lock up all this connectedness and ease and laughter and get it out again when I really need it, the next time Abby goes through a tough time. Like the next extended school vacation, or next summer. Her connectedness and disposition and entire demeanor has improved tremendously since she started school little more than a month ago. It's amazing how the structured environment of school just helps her so, so much.

What I would give to have her so connected and together, year-round.